


I'll Be Good

by EllyArcher



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Bad Poetry, Feels, I Made Myself Cry, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I'm Bad At Summaries, I'm Bad At Tagging, Letters, Mentioned James Potter, Mentioned Lily Evans Potter, My First Fanfic, One Shot, Sad Harry, Short One Shot, pure angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-10
Updated: 2020-11-10
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:47:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 843
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27495211
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EllyArcher/pseuds/EllyArcher
Summary: "...I'll be good, I'll be goodAnd I'll love the world, like I shouldYeah, I'll be good, I'll be goodFor all of the timeThat I never could..."What if a 5 year old Harry Potter wrote a letter to his dead parents?
Comments: 1
Kudos: 2





	I'll Be Good

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry for writing this. English is not my mother tongue, so forgive me for any mistakes I may have made in this oneshot.

Dear Mommy  
Dear Daddy

I didn’t know you,  
not even once  
my head  
in your loving embraces  
bowed.

I just wanted to say ‘hi’  
you have been gone so long.  
I had the opportunity  
to say goodbye?

Yours passages were brief  
through the land, where you suffered,  
loved like no one else,  
but in the end they were received by God  
like another angel in heaven.

Dear Mommy.  
I don't remember you,  
but why did you leave?  
Why do you leave me  
and took my happiness with you?

Dear Daddy.  
I don't remember you either,  
but did we have a good life?  
Were we happy together?  
Why did it all have to end?

Not everything is roses, in my garden  
It's not all flowers, in my life  
Not everything is poetry, in my words  
Not everything is love, in my heart

There's a little hate in my eyes  
There is a little pain in my soul  
There's a little smile, on my face  
There's a little sadness in my tears

No insanity, only pure loneliness ...  
No hallucination, only pure madness for your lack.

Some years ago,  
I asked Aunt Petunia  
why I was with her.  
In a cold voice, she told me  
that you had died,  
left me here alone.

I didn't understand, so  
I asked a nice postman  
and he told me that you are in heaven,  
watching me from above.  
That we would see each other again,  
someday.  
That you would be full of love and pride.

I wonder how he knew that.  
Maybe he could deliver my letters,  
until that day that we will meet.

Did you guys leave me here on purpose?  
This place that I hate.

I'm called a freak by my uncle,  
he is right?  
Or do he just like to tell big lies?

Mommy Daddy.  
I don't like him very much.  
When he is angry he hits me.  
He says I was a naughty boy,  
And that should be punished for being bad.

But, Mommy, Daddy.  
I don't know what I did wrong.  
Should I be punished for being sad?

Daddy, it hurts a lot when he use the belt.  
Please, please help me, Daddy.  
Will you defend me?

His big, rough hands catch me,  
And threw me across the room.  
He kicks me in the ribs,  
And their loud, angry voices tremble.

"You are a filthy freak"  
He says, while slapping me in the face.  
"You ungrateful shit"  
"You are nothing but a disgrace!"

He throws me in my cupboard,  
And I hear the lock click closed.  
I try to suppress a sob,  
While I wipe the blood from my cuts.  
Mommy, Daddy. How many screams  
can there be in a silence?

Please, can I live with you now?  
I had as much as I can take.

I will be a very good boy.  
I will be good, I promise.  
I can clean, sew and bake.

Aunt Petunia is not much better,  
She hits me with the pan.  
She says that if she had on her way,  
I would not live to be a man.

Dudley doesn't like me,  
He tells me to my face.  
He's not the only one who wants it,  
me to leave this place.  
It seems that I am a burden  
in these people's lives, mommy.

I dream of unknown relatives,  
Taking me away.  
But when I open my eyes,  
I am received with the day.

I do not have friends,  
Dudley made sure of that.  
Everyone is afraid of him and,  
His friend who looks like a rat.

The two are best friends,  
They criticize me at school.  
They punch me and kick me,  
And they make me look like a fool.

I thought about running away,  
But I have nowhere to go.  
I thought I would be lost forever,  
Buried under the snow.

When I try to remember you,  
I see a bright green light.  
I hear laughter and some screaming,  
And a pain that darkens my vision.

I write this letter for you, mommy and daddy.  
In the hope that you will take me away.  
I will be a good boy, please, I swear.  
Please, mommy, daddy, make my pain go away.  
I can not take it anymore.

Mommy, I miss you.  
I barely met you, but I miss you.  
I see other children with their mothers,  
are loved and embraced daily.  
I am forgotten.  
I am neglected.  
If I ever meet you,  
promise to say you love me?

Daddy, I wish I had met you.  
I wanted to remember you.  
If you were with me,  
would you have played ball with me?  
Would you have taught me how to ride a bike?  
Would you have promised to protect myself from everything and everyone?  
Would you love me?

Please mommy.  
Please, Daddy.  
Save me from this life.  
I want to meet you so much.  
Get me out of this life, please.  
I will be a good boy. I promise you.

I will give this letter to the postman,  
If they unlock my cupboard today.

Love, your son Harry.


End file.
